Making "Rash" Decisions: Pregnancy Misery and Other Such Tales

I have not posted in quite some time, so it seems appropriate that I should have a "catch up" posting. Here goes...

So I have finally jumped over the 2 month hurdle and am almost done with the first trimester (hallelujah!!!). Only 3 more weeks to go (well, 2 weeks and 4 days, but who's counting?)! This has been a very educational 2 months, although admittedly not as much fun as I had envisioned. Just so everyone is up to date and on the same page, I will start from the very beginning.

SO... I think everyone knows that Sam and I have been trying to conceive for two years with absolutely no luck! Every Mother's Day I would cry, every Father's Day I would cry, every "time of the month" I would cry. Really it was kind of pathetic. If I was ever even a day "late", I was testing, and when it would come out negative I would cry! And then when I would "start" the very next day I would cry! I am not really painting a good stable picture of myself here, but all these things are unfortunately true. Come the beginning of 2007, I finally decided to embrace the single married life and accept that a child may not be in our near future. Then one day (March 27th to be exact), I felt compelled to take a pregnancy test. I just knew in my heart that we had finally done it! I said a little prayer reminding Heavenly Father that I'd been hurt before and I didn't want to take this test if it was just going to be negative. I just couldn't handle another disappointing result. I still really felt like I should take it and that made me super excited. So it took it and..... it was negative!!! Oh man did I ever cry over that one. Surprisingly I didn't cry immediately after taking the test, or really even at all that day. But the days and weeks to follow were torture! I cried over everything. We couldn't even talk about babies without me getting emotional. I realize now that it was because I really was pregnant and my body and hormones knew it, so it was depressing to think that I wasn't (does that make sense?). Anyway, 2 weeks later I still hadn't seen my "monthly friend", so I thought it might be time to take another test. Now, I have done this many times before, where I would have negative test after negative test and then finally be months "late", so I was skeptical and had an inner struggle for about 5 minutes as to whether or not I should subject myself to the disappointment of another negative test. I figured it was worth it and took the test. Much to my surprise I saw the long awaited "positive" creep across the screen! A miracle! You would think that I would have been so excited, but on the contrary, I was pissed! I had heard of false positives before and knew they were very very rare, so it seemed a cruel joke that this would happen to me. In other words - I didn't believe it and was trying to figure out what could have caused this test malfunction! I looked and re-looked at the symbols meant for positive and negative to see if I had just gotten them confused but alas, it really was positive. I started to cry (again, not because I was excited, but because I thought something had to be wrong). I called Sam in tears and told him the test was positive. He asked what that meant and I told him it meant nothing and not to get his hopes up, but we needed to go to the doctor. After a drawn out emotional struggle, and Sam and I convincing ourselves we weren't really pregnant but had fallen victim to a faulty test, we learned that we were ridiculous people! We were really pregnant! Yay! Tons of crying and rejoicing and excitement! In the weeks to follow, I didn't feel pregnant at all. I had zero symptoms. Well, I was tired, but that's all. I hadn't been sick yet at all and I prayed constantly that I would at least get nauseous because then I'd feel pregnant. Week 6 I finally started getting nauseous! Yay! There really was a tiny baby in my belly! But wait, the nausea started getting worse. I wasn't able to eat anything. Smells made me gag. Even water made me heave. I prayed for this????? How miserable! We've all heard the term "Morning Sickness", but I am convinced this term was created by a male. And not a sensitive male either, but the kind of male who told his pregnant wife she was looking rather "tubby", or who thought that now that she was 8 months preggers, and the same size as him, this meant she would finally be a worthy wrestling opponent. Or the type of man who watches ESPN during the labor, and then wonders why she had to get that epidural because "it seemed pretty easy to me". This is the type of man who decided to call what pregnant women go through "morning sickness". I want to slap this man for introducing the worst misnomer known to womankind, and convincing everyone this is an accurate term for what actually happens. I had morning, noon, evening, and night sickness. I just felt miserable all the time, and NOT just in the morning like I had been led to believe. Then I decided heaving and nausea were not very fun, and it would be better if I were throwing up (I really am brilliant sometimes). Every time I would be bent over the toilet heaving, I would pray that I could just throw up and make it all go away! Then comes week eight and TADA!! Who says Heavenly Father doesn't answer our prayers? I was throwing up and I was right - it was way better than dry heaving! At least when you throw up it takes some of the pressure off your tummy. But the other thing it does it takes all the nutrients and liquids from you and your fetus. So my vomiting spells landed me in the hospital where I got pumped full of liquids with the help of my little IV friend. I also received a wonder drug called Zofran - the medical term for "Shannon's best friend". It is an anti-nausea medication designed for people coming out of chemo, but it works wonders for "morning sickness". I felt so much better all full of fluid and no queasiness. So I went and got a huge lunch (that I'd love to tell you all about but it is making me gag just thinking about it). The ER sent me home with a prescription for Zofran, but I felt so good for the next two days that I didn't even need it. This turned out to be a good thing as the night of the hospital visit my skin started hurting very badly on my left hip and then I broke out into a beautiful rash. I hadn't eaten anything strange or touched anything weird, so I figured I was probably allergic to my new medication as that was the only new thing I'd been exposed to. So I suffered through the weekend hoping to get to the doctor so he could tell me what I had and why I had it. Was it hives? A food allergy? Skin allergy? A bug bite? Really it could have been anything. I get to the doctor Monday afternoon. He takes one look at it and tells me I have.......shingles!!! Yay! What a joy!! That really was the craziest thing I could have expected. For those of you who don't know, shingles is a rash caused by a virus. The very same virus that causes chicken pox. What are the odds? It is very painful and very irritating. Like I said, this has been a very educational 2 months. And I think the biggest lesson I've learned so far is to expect anything while you're pregnant. Really. :) Now I have a great anti-nausea medication, but today it didn't do me any good because I was throwing up so much I couldn't keep it down! If I see food I throw it up. I don't even have to eat it, just look at it. Honestly. I can't wait until I'm done with this stage and on to the discomforts of being big. I feel like that will be much more tolerable! :) Well, that's my update. Healthy baby, healthy heartbeat, not so healthy momma. Stay tuned for pictures of the newest Banks and yours truly!! Thanks for all your prayers and thoughts, and we love you all!!!!!!!